Mothers and Daughters

Mothers and Daughters

Belinda @ Kids Matter

“Probably, there is nothing in human nature more resonant with charges than the flow of energy between two biologically alike bodies, one of which has lain in amniotic bliss inside the other, one of which has labored to give birth to the other. The materials are here for the deepest mutuality and the most painful estrangement.” Adrienne Rich, Of Woman Born: Motherhood as Experience and Institution

As a daughter, and a mother of a daughter, I will be the first to admit there is a fine line walked. Feet in proper position and arms extended outward, we tread softly and gingerly down that line, back and forth, most of our lives. We want to be the daughter that makes our mother proud, yet we want to be the mother that makes our daughters proud. It’s an inner battle that sometimes bleeds over into our daily lives. How do we seal and preserve the bond that is the inner sanctity of the relationship?

Women, throughout history, agree on one thing… there is no simple answer. Relationships are tricky, be it with spouses, parents, or children. Keeping relationship balance is hard. There are times throughout life when one must give more than the other and there are times when both have to give an equal amount. When the daughter is a child the mother gives way more than she receives. When the mother becomes advanced in age, it is the daughter doing the greatest percentage of giving. In between, however, lays a whole span of time when the shift of giving swings back and forth like a pendulum on an old grandfather clock. It is during this time that estrangements can and often do occur. How you choose to handle those situations is what, in the end, defines your success as a mother.

The key, in mother daughter relationships, is honesty and open communication by both parties. Maybe you feel you can’t be open and honest because it would hurt her feelings. I can assure you of one thing… honesty is much more appreciated than dishonesty. As my husband likes to say, “What is she gonna do, take away your birthday?” Don’t be afraid to be open and honest in your mother daughter relationship. Chances are, if you aren’t, whatever foolishness you did as a child will come back trifold on you as a parent, with your own children. Life has a funny way of paying you back.

Happy Mother’s Day to all the Mommas out there, and especially to my own! I love you, Mom, always have and always will!

A Rose for Mother

by Cleo M. Shoffstall

Another Mother's Day is here,

Bringing joy and pleasures new,

On this special day, Mother dear,

I want to remember you.

I cannot give you costly gifts,

And I've told you this before,

No matter what I give to you,

You give back much, much more.

I'm giving you a pure, sweet rose,

Gathered in the early morn,

This rose you planted in my heart,

The day that I was born.

In kindly, loving thoughts of you,

And with the faith you still impart,

The rose I give to you today,

Is the love that's in my heart.